Strip Clubs Aren't Much Fun Without Money

And that's not to mention this was a non-smoking place. Oh, and they don't serve drinks either. ("Drink"-type drinks, you know ...)

But it's full nudity, and I guess that's the rules for ya. "That'll do, pig."

And since the ATM felt like totally fucking me rather than the girl—or seven—I would have pretended was doing that to me using its money instead, I was a little salty.

But, hey, all for a good cause—Because thankfully this was going on in the background while some naked woman was dancing on a stage. And we were bidding a good friend a fond farewell.

"No, we're okay ... now please step out of the way."

A good time was had by all, I'm sure—except for the few San Antonio fans in attendance.

Better luck next year. And hopefully our friend is as eager to re-attend upon returning to town in June, when we won't rely on the ATM.